Affection
by NekuSakuraba101
Summary: The first time he kissed her... shouldn't really count. The second time is a completely different story. The third time, everything's changed. The fourth was not long after. And the fifth time, it's a late September afternoon... and lot had changed as of late. Rated T cause I'm paranoid.


The first time he kissed her... shouldn't really count. Despite being not even being in the double digits of age, the kiss held more innocent intentions then others.

It was a warm evening, so much so that it urged Shuuya to kick of the thin covers from the bed. He lays on his back, looking up at the metal frame of the top bunk and the bare mattress that peaked through. Sometimes he forgot they weren't the only ones who slept in here.

He then glances over at his other two companions. Kousuke has his face buried in the only available pillow, curled up, trying to take up the least amount of space that he can. He curls into Tsubomi's back, who is facing Shuuya, face resting in the palm of one of her hands. He's glad she's here, that she's comfortable enough to be in their presence. His eyes continue to linger on her, and he's moved with the sudden urge.

To him, kisses have yet to signify anything other than pure affection. His mother had sometimes kissed him as an apology, letting him know she was sorry and that the worst was over (for now), and sometimes even the lady caretakers here at the orphanage would kiss the tops of their heads in comfort.

Shuuya finds himself leaning in slowly. He planned on maybe kissing her on the top of her forehead, but his action suddenly seems misguided and he tries to abort. It's, however, too late and he ends up pressing his lips awkwardly near the top of her eye.

He recoils quickly, suddenly feeling very embarrassed and even horrified when Kido cracks open one of her eyes and he sees a very familiar shade of diluted red. Their eyes lock for a moment, and Shuuya tries to think of some excuse, but all that rolls off is a very hushed, "...t-thank you."

Heart pounding, he waits for her response. Her eyes pierce right through him, and he wonders if she hates him. He couldn't bare that, if she did. Not the girl who offered him her scarf, the one who wasn't afraid to hurt him if he lost control of his powers, the one who could provide better support to Kousuke if he needed it.

Instead, the girl's mouth twitches into a small, sleepy smile. "I hope that's not how you thank Kousuke." she says, so softly that he might not have heard if he wasn't listening for it.

The response is exactly what he needed and he chuckles softly, shaking his head, relieved.

...

The second time is a completely different story. All three are much older now, not to mention wiser. It's an age where emotions sizzle and passions boil hot under skin, and he is no exception.

He probably meant it as a joke - maybe, he doesn't really recall - but he knows Tsubomi is not prepared for it. He kisses her and she's far too stunned to move.

He fingers the stiff fabric of her uniform shirt and her hair, finally allowed to grow passed shoulder-length, brushes against his wrist. It doesn't last long after the initial few seconds when Tsubomi finally regains ground and pushes him back, not very gently either.

She has also changed, the years making her more prickly than she had been on their initial meeting. She is no longer as scared or as shy as she once was. Her emotions are much more tapped down than before, and instead it seems like only one is allowed out anymore - irritation.

That's probably Shuuya's fault. They fight more than they get along, personalities clashing. The balance from when they were children faltering under the weight of adolescence.

Her irritation flares her as she screeches at him, face red with embarrassment? Anger? Possibly a mixture of both, he supposes. She wants to hit him, he knows, but she doesn't. He takes her harsh words with a wink and a grin, seemingly unfazed.

This causes Tsubomi to darken. "Is this just a joke to you?" she demands, voice pitching in a way he's not familiar with. He then has the audacity to keep grinning and try to laugh it off.

Kido then leaves him, a tangle of dark emotions he's created. "You shouldn't kiss people unless you mean it."

...

The third time, everything's changed. He goes by Kano now, at his own behest. It makes sense as he's not who he once was.

The joking nature is still there, and he carries that sharp smile almost perpetually fixed to his face, but there's darkness inside his that wasn't always there. He knows too much and it's killing him. He bites his tongue to suppress the urge to spill every dirty secret and filthy lie, but that would only put everyone in danger.

Soon it becomes easier. Soon he stops thinking about it. However, some nights, he's not so lucky.

Usually on these nights, he leaves. He walks until his feet become sore and his knees buckle, trying to piece his mask back together before he faces the others again, and it works.

But, tonight, he hasn't left yet. There's something holding him back. He doesn't want to move from his spot on the couch, no matter how much Kano knows he should. It isn't till Kido walks out into the living room and sits next to him that he knows it's too late.

Kido is not one to be fooled lightly. Kano knew he had to try especially hard around her and Seto because they knew him better than maybe he did himself. She stares at him leaning back on the couch. For once, he's actually jealous of Seto because he desperately wants to know what she's thinking and seeing when she stares at him.

"Did you have a nightmare?" she then asks him.

Kano wants to laugh. He _wishes_ that was all it was. He shrugged, still silent.

Kido then shifts closer, and he flinches visibly, too fast to hide it. She stops, but only for a moment, and then her arms are wrapped around him, holding him closely. Kano stiffens, but then relaxes. He doesn't hug back and Kido doesn't seem to care.

"We're here for you Kano, don't you see that?" she asks him, and she sounds truly grieved.

Kido was so stronger. Stronger than him. Maybe that made sense as she was the oldest out of the trio, but Kano knew he could never be like her, no matter how much he wanted to be. Tears threatened to spill and he latched onto Kido, trembling. He wants to tell her, he wants to tell her so badly.

Kano doesn't know how long they stay like that, but it feels like a while. They're tangled up, leaning against the back of the couch. It's not the most comfortable position, but Kano doesn't care. Kido's breathing has slowed and he wonders if she's fallen asleep. He pulls back, and no, she's not, but her eyes are heavy.

"You're a lot of trouble, y'know that?" Kido told him before lifting her hand as she yawned, "I hope you appreciate what I do for you."

Maybe it was the way that Kido was trying to laugh off Kano's vulnerable moment for his sake, maybe it was her talking about how he should appreciate her for what she did for him, or maybe it was the sudden unexpected, unreasonable feeling he had that everything was going to be okay, but whatever the reason, that's when Kano leaned in and kissed her.

Perhaps Kido was too sleepy, or the memory from middle school had been washed away after all these years, but she didn't back away.

Her lips were soft and Kano was surprised by how much he wanted to continue kissing her. So he did. It was an awkward and hesitant kiss, holding only the slightest hint of desperation on his side, and when they parted Kido was breathing quickly.

Kido looked at him wearily and definitely more away now. Kano then managed to grin. "I mean it."

...

The fourth was not long after. Kido had joined him on one of his nightly walks, and he was glad for her company.

It's early in the morning, an ungodly hour to be up for most people, but Kido didn't seem to mind. They walked in comfortable silence most of it. Kano would sometimes supply comments here and there, but most of the time neither would speak. Their arms brushed in a light, comfortable way until it eventually ended with Kido intertwining her fingers in his.

Kano couldn't remember the last time he had been nervous in a good way, if he had ever. Having Kido here brought it out of him though. He didn't want this to end.

When the lights started going out on the street as the sun peaked over the horizon, they started heading back. With in no time, they were back at the base, and Kano was following Kido inside. She probably expected him to either stay on the couch or into his and Seto's room, but he continued to follow her until she was outside her own room.

She then looked back at him with a raised eyebrow. "What are you doing?"

"Oh c'mon. You know Mary isn't in there." He wasn't ready to be away from her yet. Kido turned away, maybe to hide her flustered face, before opening the door.

Kano was right, the small, albino girl wasn't in there. Kido then barely had time to even sit down before Kano started kissing her.

He, admittedly, was a little too forceful with his approach because Kido soon pushed his shoulders back as he resisted the urge to whine in protest. "T-take it easy there." she told him with a slight glare and an unsteady voice.

Kano immediately felt apologetic. "Sorry, guess I-" but Kido was already reaching for him and the sentence died in his throat.

Kano made a mental note to do this more often as Kido tilted her head to deepen the kiss. Perhaps there was something in the air in the early morning because Kano didn't ever remember a time she seemed more brazen than now. One arm was wrapped around his neck and the other with her hand tangled in his hair. Their kissing soon became sloppy, but continued.

Finally, when they broke apart, Kano pressed his face into the crook of Kido's neck. Her breath was coming out fast and short and he could feel her hurried pulse through her skin. It made his own skip a beat.

" _Tsubomi..._ " he whispered her name - her first name, the one he hadn't felt like he'd uttered in a lifetime - feverishly into her neck, "...I love you."

She didn't answer, and that was fine, though he felt a little disappointed. He closed his eyes and leaned against her.

"I love you too." it was soft, but his eyes opened when he heard it. He strained his ears for anything else, but all there was only her now steady breathing.

...

The fifth time, it's a late September afternoon... and lot had changed as of late.

Kano sat on a bench outside a hospital room. He doesn't feel it's appropriate to be there now. If anything, the only one he thought deserved to be there was Takane, though everyone wanted to make sure Konoha/Haruka/ He'd never been one to hate crowds, but right now there are far too many in the cramped little room, including Kido.

Their relationship had been strained for a few weeks now, and he hated it. He had lost her so many times before this, in times best not remembered, where he'd watched her die. Again and again it had happened and he'd been powerless to do anything, but now, it was the secrets he'd tried so hard to keep from her that separated them.

When the time came where he couldn't take it anymore, he knew this would happen. Maybe that's why he told Seto first. He knew she would be angry at him for keeping these things from her, especially after she'd lain her own self bare to him. He felt bad about it, he really did.

Now, they were the only ones left in the apartment/base, and she barely spoke to him.

He had a small foam cup in his hand that had once held mild, hospital brewed coffee, and was now breaking it into strips. That's when Kido came out. She still had her purple-grey hoodie on, but the hood was down and her hair wasn't in a ponytail like usual. He looked up only for a second before casting his eyes back down at the floor.

He expected her to leave, maybe say something along the lines of 'I'm heading back.' Instead, she took a seat beside him. Kano didn't want to seem desperate, like he wanted to burst out an beg Kido to forgive him and melt into a puddle of submission even if that's exactly how he felt. He could take her over bearing chores and sharp words if only she wouldn't leave him, never to be seen again.

"You're not going in there?" was what she finally said.

Kano gave her a sidelong glance and a mirthless smile. "I suppose that's rude of me?"

Kido looked thoughtful, eyes darting back to the room. "No. He doesn't really remember..." she trailed off, "but maybe that's for the best."

Kano was silent. He wished he couldn't remember, honestly.

Then she said, "I'm not mad at you."

His eyes widened in surprise, a tidal wave of emotions crashing over him. He tried to laugh and say, "Ha ha, I knew that~", but it was easier said than done since he didn't have his powers anymore. Instead, he probably looked like he was in pain.

Kido gave him a sympathetic smile. "I was, a bit, when you first told me everything." she admitted, "but... now I feel like an idiot thinking the only thinking it was grief and nightmares bothering you when it was so much more."

"I didn't want to..." There was a lump in his throat he couldn't seem to get passed.

Kido's hand then cupped his cheek and kissed him softly, tentatively, a much simpler form of forgiveness than just words. With everything that happened, he accepted it eagerly.

...

After that, he lost count.


End file.
